Blind
by The Silent Rain
Summary: LJ. "A nap in the pouring rain at ten at night, outside, under a tree?" That disgusting smirk widens. "You sure know how to make such mundane things as sleeping into real adventures, Evans." If I had it in me to punch Potter in the face, I would have.
D

Okay, I have to admit, I love the rain. Marlene thinks I'm insane, but there's just something about it. The way it sounds, the way it feels on my face when I run, the way it can change everything. I mean, seriously. It feels like…life.

There's nowhere else I'd rather be than alone outside, like I am right now. It's peaceful. It's getting dark, but I don't care. I've been out here for a few hours and I'm soaked, but this is what I love, almost more than anything else. So how, might you ask, did I end up out here?

 _I'm stuck in the Gryffindor common room right now and it's about four-thirty in the afternoon in May. If Marlene wouldn't look at me like I'm crazy, I'd go outside for a run. And it's pouring outside. Come on. The weather's perfect!_

" _Lily. Lily! Lily!" Marlene is almost yelling my name._

" _What?"_

" _You've been staring out the window for about twenty minutes. I need to practice my presentation on Thestrals for Care of Magical Creatures and you haven't even been listening to me!" Marlene sighs loudly and theatrically._

" _I'm sorry!" I respond defensively._

 _Marlene's my best friend. Seriously, I couldn't live without her. Okay, so maybe she's a little bit of a pain sometimes, but she keeps me grounded and sane, and that's more than I can ask for. We've been close since first year, and I'm truthfully surprised she's even dealt with my crap this long. It's seventh year now and she's still coping with me. Damn, is that girl good._

" _Oh, whatever," she groans. "But if I fail, I will be sure to thank you for helping me…"_

" _Shut up, Marly-doll," I coo. "You know I'd neeeeever let that happen!"_

 _She pushes me lightly. "Shove it, Evans. So are you going to the Quidditch game with me or what?"_

"… _the Quidditch game?" I ask stupidly. What Quidditch game? She says "the Quidditch game" like it's something I'm supposed to know about…_

" _Uh, yes Lily, the one that's in half an hour. The one that's the championship between Gryffindor and Slytherin. The one that you told me yesterday you couldn't wait for. Ring a bell?"_

" _Oh. That Quidditch game." I don't even remember saying that, to be honest. "You sure it won't get cancelled? It's like…a hurricane outside."_

" _Yes, that Quidditch game. And since when did Quidditch ever get cancelled? If there were a tornado, it would still be on," she says with an eye-roll. "Get up. We've got to go watch Gryffindor kick some Slytherin arse."_

 _Like I even really want to go. Whatever. It's the last Quidditch game of the rest of my Hogwarts career, and after this, I'll never have to watch another bloody Quidditch game. It's a horrifically boring sport, really. A bunch of arrogant jocks that think they're Merlin's gift to women soaring around on brooms, throwing balls through hoops. Now, if they'd start pitching people off brooms towards the ground, things would get a little more exciting. Well, only if it's James Potter they're throwing at the ground..._

 _As Marlene drags me up the stairs to our dormitory, I can't help but wonder what it is that girls see in that guy. He's had a gigantic crush on me for years, but he's conceited. He's gorgeous, I'll concede that, but I refuse to be a shallow idiot about this. Half the girls in my year practically want to smite me for "breaking his heart" or something along those lines. Right. Well, he can't take a bloody hint. I'd rather not date a pig. He hexes people for fun and he's a sadistic jerk that's had everything he ever wanted in life handed to him on a silver platter. A girl would have to be daft to actually like a guy like that. He's got this disgusting posse, too, and they've got these self-satisfying nicknames for themselves too, but I've got no idea what they mean. Probably some secret code between the group of them. It's Potter, his buddy Sirius Black, who's just as bad as he is, Peter Pettigrew, this guy that follows them around everywhere, and Remus Lupin, who's actually really nice. I haven't the foggiest how he ended up running with the likes of them, but whatever. His choice._

 _Tossing on some boots, I grab a hat. I don't need much. It's warm out._

" _Hey idiot, want to grab an umbrella?" Marlene shoots me a look like I've just lost it as I walk back to the stairs to the common room._

" _I'll be fine," I answer cheerfully._

" _An Impervious Charm? Anything?"_

" _Nope."_

 _Marlene shrugs. "Suit yourself. If you get sick, don't cry to me." She puts the Impervious Charm on herself and grabs my arm as she runs down to the common room. "Now hurry up, sweet thing, or we're gonna be late!"_

 _So we sprint out to the Quidditch pitch, practically flying. It's soaking outside and I kind of regret not taking an umbrella. Thank God Marlene knows me so well and brought one anyway. Love that girl._

 _Potter's a Chaser on the Gryffindor Quidditch team, and he's the Captain. Perfect to inflate his gigantic head even more. It's disgusting. His buddy Black's a beater, too. The pair of them are like twins and they practically feed off each other. I think they make it a point to have detention together every week. At least it's seventh year. I'll be done with those jerks in a few more weeks._

 _So now that I'm stuck out here in the stands next to obsessive Potter/Black fan girls, watching a sport I hate, I'm really having the time of my life._

 _The game's over in about half an hour, the fastest Quidditch game I think they played all year. It was truthfully a pretty unexciting "championship" game, but I'm not going to complain. Gryffindor won, so now I can go back to my dorm, finish my homework, and get some much-needed sleep. But it's raining a little less now…_

 _Marlene and I walk out of the stands together, but I'd rather not go back to the castle yet. I've got too much on my mind, and it's raining._

 _I slip the umbrella back to Marlene. "Take it. I'm going for a walk."_

" _Lily Evans, you're the only woman I know that gives someone else her umbrella in the pouring rain so she can take a walk." She just shakes her head and goes back to the castle. She knows how I am sometimes and she knows better than to reason with me._

So _that_ is how I got myself outside for the past few hours. I'm not complaining, though. The rain helps me think. It clears my head and it feels like I'm washing away everything that keeps eating at me. Like why that bloody Potter boy is on my mind all the time, even though I hate his guts. Whatever. He's not exactly worth my consideration and thought, anyway. I've got bigger problems, like how I'm going to cope with my sister's wedding that's coming up next month to that whale, Vernon…

All right, I'm getting a bit cold and it's completely dark out now. Back to the castle I go. I guess I should slip in around the side, then, just in case…

And the door is locked. It's bloody _locked._ Just my luck. And if I knock, I bet it'll be Filch that answers, and hello to a week of detention.

" _Alohomora,_ " I mutter. And of course it doesn't work. It's bloody _Hogwarts._ Of _course_ " _Alohomora_ " doesn't work on the damn door. Okay, now I'm in trouble.

So I stalk off across the grounds. I might as well find some shelter and hope Marlene comes out to look for me before it gets too late. I guess I could sleep out here, worst case scenario, but I'd really rather not.

There's a tree nearby. It's old and I think it's an oak, but hell, it's not like I'm well-versed in the world of trees. I sit underneath it. Shelter from the rain.

I close my eyes for a while. Couldn't hurt to take a tiny nap, could it?

I'm not really sure how long it's been before I hear a voice from next to me.

"Evans. _Evans._ "

I thought at first it was Marlene, finally coming out to get me, but it's a boy's voice. Hell, it's really deep. It's a _man's_ voice. I open my eyes and look around. There's no one there. Hm. Maybe I'm asleep and this is a part of my dream…

And _that_ is when James Potter appears out of thin air, right next to me.

"Oh my GOD!"

"Did I scare you?" The wanker has the _gall_ to look amused as he sits down next to me. I'd pay good money to wipe that hideous smirk right off his admittedly gorgeous face. How the hell did he get here?

I glare. "So what if you did? It's not every day that James Potters materialize right next to me when I'm trying to take a damn nap."

"A nap in the pouring rain at ten at night, outside, under a tree?" That disgusting smirk widens. "You sure know how to make such mundane things as sleeping into real adventures, Evans."

I close my eyes and lay my head back against the trunk of the tree. "Shut up. Why are you out here, anyway?"

"I like rain," he says simply.

"Oh."

Well, that's that. We don't speak for a while, and I'm not complaining.

After a few minutes of this, I get up and he just looks at me, quirking an eyebrow. "Going somewhere?"

"Yes. Back inside. I mean, I know I'm a true adventurer and all, sleeping underneath trees in rainstorms, but I'm starting to think my bed would be slightly more comfortable." I leave him sitting underneath the oak, walking towards the door leading back into the castle. I hope he left it unlocked.

He didn't. Great.

Looking like an idiot, I walk back to the tree. He's outright snickering now. Oh, how I'd love to slap him.

"Don't know how to open a door, Evans?"

"It's _locked,_ you _arse._ "

"It's locked?" Potter looks slightly horrified. "No it isn't!" He gets up and runs to the door, leaving on the ground some sort of silvery fabric. It looks like a cloak…

He gets back before I can get a good look at whatever it is. "Dammit," he mutters. "This is perfect. Just perfect."

"I'm not too hot about this either, Potter," I snap. "If you were going to come out here, the least you could do was leave a damn door unlocked. Oh wait, I forgot, you've been hit in the head with a Bludger too many times to even realize that would be a _good idea._ "

He shoots me a furious look. "Shut it, Evans."

"You got us into this."

The rain's lightened to a drizzle now, and we're sitting underneath the tree, glaring at each other. After a moment, he gets up, stuffing that mysterious fabric into his pocket.

"What is that?" I ask, pointing to his pocket.

"None of your business. My secrets aren't for your knowing." He starts walking away.

Oh God, he's going to leave me out here to drown in the rain.

"Potter!" I call after him. "Where are you going?"

He stops. He turns around and stares at me. "To find a way back into the castle, of course." He pauses, and adds as a second thought, "Come on. I'd feel awful if I left you out here alone."

We walk together around the grounds, saying nothing to each other. I have no idea where he's planning on taking us, but I'd rather not ask. Something about this silence between us is calming. I can't explain it. Like there's something unsaid, but I'm not sure what.

After a while, he speaks to me again.

"So what _were_ you doing out here, really, Evans?"

"I was _taking_ a _nap._ " I can tell from the expression on his face that he knows I'm lying, at least to an extent. "And I was thinking," I confess. "There's a lot on my mind and…there's just something about the rain that helps me think."

Potter just nods. Another moment passes before I choose to speak again.

"So why were _you_ out here? You never really struck me as a 'walk-in-the-rain' type."

"I dunno. I guess maybe the same reasons you have. I just wanted to escape, really. I didn't want to be around Sirius and Remus and Peter tonight."

"That's a first," I snort. He doesn't respond, and I worry that I've crossed some sort of unspoken line. "I mean…I'm sorry, I didn't mean for that to sound…rude." Yeah I did. I just didn't realize it would bother me if I hurt his feelings…wait…I feel bad?

He still doesn't speak, and I'm starting to get a little worried.

"You know Evans, I tried to change for you," he says suddenly. "I tried to bloody change for you, but you're too damn blind to even see that."

I'm taken aback. Where the hell did this come from? Before I can say anything, he continues.

"You're too obsessed with hating me to even see that I'm not who I used to be. You've got this image of me as an arrogant prick that doesn't care anybody and doesn't love anybody but himself." He stops walking and looks at me with his piercing hazel eyes. Suddenly the air between us feels thick. We're facing each other, and standing very, very close. I can practically feel his warm breath. "I'm not like that anymore, but you still treat me like crap. Can't you try to see me as who I am now, instead of looking at me through the eyes of a fifteen-year-old girl who saw me hang her best friend upside-down by the ankle in midair? That's not me anymore, Lily."

It's the first time he's used my first name all night, and I have no idea what to say.

"Potter, I…"

It doesn't matter that I had absolutely nothing prepared to respond with, because at that moment, he closes the small space between our lips. He kisses me furiously and it takes me a moment to realize what's going on. I've kissed before, trust me, but it's never been anything like this. There's this _sensation._

His lips are soft and pliant despite his anger as he runs his hands through my hair, soaked with rain to a deep, dark red shade. I can't help but respond, taking his face in my own hands. I don't know what's come over me, but I don't mind it, whatever it is. If I knew that kissing James Potter would feel like this, I would have let it happen a long, long time ago.

He tastes like apples and he smells like rain. There's something about this boy that I can't resist now. He softens and I feel how his fury dissipates in the kiss, and the fire is gone, but what takes its place is no less brilliant. Between us is this beautiful peace, like roses or something equally as sweet and delicate.

James breaks off the kiss after what could have been either hours, years, even, or mere seconds.

"Still think I haven't changed?" he asks huskily, resting his forehead against mine. I gaze into his eyes, entranced.

"You're much better," I almost squeak, dazedly.

"Give me a chance," he whispers. "Please."

I smile. "Fine, James."

He picks me up and spins me around, his demeanor changed, as I shriek girlishly in surprise. "Put me down!"

"Say it, first," he says mischievously. "And _then_ I'll put you down."

"I'll give you a chance, I swear!"

He lightly drops me back to the ground on my feet and, arms still around me, kisses me once more on the mouth. "You, my dear, are a dream come true." We kiss some more and I feel like I'm in heaven. To think I hated him mere hours ago. I already feel like a fool for always assuming the worst in him. James was right. I've been so blind…

Breaking the kiss, he takes my hand. "Come with me. We can't spend all night out here. It's getting close on midnight."

I wish I could kiss him forever and ever, but I know I can't. Reluctantly, I follow him off in the direction of the locker room where the boys change into their Quidditch gear. "Where are we going?" I ask.

"To get my broom."

"…to get your WHAT?"

"I'm going to fly you up to the girls' dormitory. The window'll probably be open since it's warm out, and you can get back inside."

I stare at him in disbelief. "James, you're insane."

"My dear, you have no idea. This is your chance to be, too." Arm around me, he leads me into the locker room. "We leave our brooms in the closet over here, and I've got the key." He opens it and pulls out his broom. We get back outside and he gets on it, looking at me expectantly. "Well, come on. Get on behind me."

I have serious misgivings about this, but so far tonight I've already gotten locked outside, slept under a tree in the pouring rain, argued with James Potter, and kissed James Potter. I might as well make this even crazier by getting on the back of James Potter's broom and _flying_ up to a dormitory.

"Ready for takeoff," he says with a goofy grin as I get on behind him and wrap my arms around his strong waist. I almost scream as we lift off the ground. I haven't flown in Merlin knows how long. I stifle the cry into his shoulder, which I can tell he clearly doesn't mind from the way he reacts as we soar higher and higher, all the way up to the seventh story of Hogwarts.

"I think this is it…" he mutters as we slow down. He starts counting windows. "One…two…three… _four._ This should be it."

I really would rather not know how he knows how many windows in the Gryffindor girls' dormitory is from the corner of the building, so I'm not going to ask. The window's open and he pulls up next to it so I can get inside the building. I awkwardly climb through the window, doing my best not to look down the two hundred or so feet that I am above the ground.

"Thank you…James," I whisper, hoping no one in the dorm is awake.

He smiles in the moonlight. "I just wanted to tell you," he whispers, "You're beautiful in the rain."

With those final words, he kisses me one last time through the window, and flies away. I have a feeling this is only the beginning of something very, very, big. It's like standing at the edge of a cliff, holding your breath, and jumping into the sea for a thrill. Only with this, I don't mind falling forever.


End file.
